By Jim Robertson
Dear Uncle Jim,
Looking through the list of Hunting Accidents on the C.A.S.H. website, I see that a fall from a tree stand is one of the most common accidents for every year recorded. Why do you suppose there are so many hunting accidents involving tree stands?
Lynn G., Springfield, MA
Dear Lynn,
I would say that the main reason hunters are falling from tree stands left and right is because humans are not arboreal—they’re a ground-dwelling species. Large animals, like leopards, who spend so much of their time in trees, have claws for climbing and long tails to help them keep their balance.
Hunters want to have their cake and eat it too. They want to pretend they’re essential natural predators, yet they supplement their kills with food of all groups from grocery stores, buy the finest all-weather clothing and safety equipment to bring along with them on their forays into the wilderness (or at least, away from their creature comforts) and never leave home without their smartphones so they can call for help whenever anything goes awry (which, judging by the growing number of high-cost rescues they receive, are practically everyday events for them).
If they want to be considered true predators, like lions, wolves, or polar bears, hunters need to de-evolve and grow claws, fur and maybe a tail (preferably prehensile). Otherwise, they’re like a bunch of clowns, sitting up in trees, their butts on lawn chairs until gravity teaches them a lesson they’ll never forget—if they’re lucky enough to live through the experience.
Until then, they should try to stay safe and sane and find themselves another sport to play.
Uncle Jim
Dear Uncle Jim,
I support C.A.S.H. in their attitudes towards deer hunting, but don’t you at least agree that hunters are necessary for controlling all the invasive species you hear so much about lately?
Stan E., Toledo, OH
Dear Stan,
That’s an interesting question coming from a member of hands down the most invasive species on the planet doing the most damage ever caused by one species since the dawn of time. But I assume you’re referring to the “lesser creatures” like mute swans or barred owls that hunters are gearing up to gun down.
Cormorants too are being targeted for the sake of sport fishermen. Ironically, it seems humans have a special hatred for any species—besides their own—that are successful in this world, yet as they’ve learned, nature (temporarily) rewards any species who’ve found a way to thrive.
But don’t encourage the swell-headed hunter crowd that they’re useful or necessary in any way, shape or form. Mass-killing is never the answer for anything, even for “unwanted” animals who they conveniently stereotype as “invasives,” or think of as competition.
One more thing about the overused word, “invasive.” Nearly every species now labeled as such was brought to this continent by humans, often expressly for the sole purpose of sport hunting. Wild boars leap to mind. Although their eradication efforts enjoy nearly universal public support, individuals of that species during those hunts suffer even more cruelty than the average ‘game’ species and their deaths are often tallied in the high dozens during contest hunts. Attitudes towards invasives can’t be good for any overly successful species who pride themselves as being civilized.
Uncle Jim
Dear Uncle Jim,
What can you tell me about CWD and how do you think it will affect the future of hunting?
Chester H., Fargo, ND
Dear Chester,
Chronic Wasting Disease (CWD) is a deadly, incurable transmissible spongiform encephalopathy caused by an infectious prion, or misfolded protein. It was first discovered in a captive deer herd in Colorado in 1967 and spread to wild elk by 1981. CWD is related to mad cow disease which came about when cattle in feed lots were given a feed mixture that included powdered animal parts. I suspect that captive deer were given a similar feed, meant to stimulate fast growth in commercial animals.
Worse, even, than Charlton Heston’s character leaning that Soylent Green was made from people, ungulate’s reaction to the cannibalistic food sources causes them to stumble, walk in circles and sleep for excessively long periods of time. They can go on like this for up to a year but always die soon after that.
The question of how it will affect hunters is tricky, because the symptoms can mimic the effects of too much beer or bourbon and hunting season seems to inspire excessive consumption of these substances by tradition, assumably to further deaden the consciences of “sportsmen” and inspire their urge to kill.
CWD is transmitted through contact or consumption of an infected carcass (venison, anyone?) and cooking does not inactivate the CWD prion. Bon Appetit but be careful what you eat.
Uncle Jim